When I embarked on my journey into design in 2016, I was certain it was the only suitable pursuit for my jumbled and chaotic thought process. I began acquiring the fundamentals of design and quickly understood that design isn't just a form of expression - it's actually its antithesis. It involves setting a destination and designing solutions for another person's issues. Imagine it similar to a doctor's consultation, except the user seldom straightforwardly communicates their problems; I had to rely on my abilities to discern their needs. Diving deeper into the realm of design, I discovered that it was more about psychology than creativity. I realized that progression in this industry required a shift in my mental model. "Design is disorganized" is what everyone told us in school where as in reality - the only way to hone your craft is organization. "The user always takes the forefront" - the user only takes precedence if there is enough funding to the business, "You originate the concept and design the product" - you only facilitate somebody else's ideas. Amidst this professional confusion, I felt disoriented and contemplated focusing solely on $$$ gain. This approach quickly failed and I resolved to readjust when I took a sabbatical for a year to recreate my skillset, attitude, and comprehension of design. I returned in 2024 as a transformed person, giving priority to organise all aspects (my Figma files, icons, desk, sleep regimen, pretty much everything). My only concern now is to wake up and quite simply, create and improve by a marginal 1% at my work every single day. It matters little whether I do this with or without clients, with or without monetary incentives. I pursue this like a ritual. It's essentially all I know. Design has evolved from being my bread to my raison d'etre.